coupling.

n. 1.the name of a highly sexualized version of the American television series "Friends". 2. a sight that incites bitter feelings from the composer of this blog.

That being said...seeing happy couples, p.d.a. and anything else dating and or relationship related hurts me...and relatively deeply mind you. Fuck it. Who needs any of it anyhow.?

Buenos Noches Santander.

This is it...One leg of a journey complete.

So yeah...I'm leaving tomorrow and I can't believe how quickly all the time passed. Tomorrow morning, I'm moving on to Rome. I don't know the scope of feelings my groupmates share in respect to this city, but I know for myself that this place (and country as a whole) affected me in a major way. I'm coming back a changed person for life no question about that. Needless to say, in many ways I'll be better for that. So yeah...

I'm looking forward to the change of scenery. Rome, as tourist catering as it is, will be dope I'm sure. I've always wanted to see and I intend to do as many of the generic touristy things as I can stand (haha). I have to say, the one big thing I'm looking forward to though is the Vatican. I'm not the most devout Catholic, but as a Filipino, Catholicism is a huge part of my culture and the faith that I have the most faith in. I've always been intrigued by it, the art, culture and all of that. Also, my parents have always wanted to see it and this is the experience I would love most to bring back to them. Most of all though, I can't wait to experience yet another culture and language. I'm really excited for all of it.

Going back to the subject of change, I don't feel a laundry list is necessary, because once I (finally) get back to the States. I'd rather be about it than talk about it. In lieu of this, I've got much to prepare for the remainder of the year. I'm looking forward to sharing stories, pictures, experiences with all my friends and family back home. I appreciate everyone that's been staying up with me throughout this thing. In your own ways, great to minute, you all have helped me to get through this thing.

More to come in Roma...check my Spain pics on facebook.

Peace!

Frustration 4th.

I'll be the first to admit when I'm wrong and when I've got shortcomings. Lately, communication has been the big one. On the positive tip, in the time I've been in this country my comprehension game has gone up in a major way. The tempo of speech here has slowed down for me to the point of sounding like good ol' American English (with the exception of the few drunken and eccentric accents here and there). I was in class today and for some odd reason never felt so frustrated with speaking Spanish. One of my shortcomings is that I hate to be put on the spot, I'll admit that I'm not so quick on the draw when I'm caught verbally off-guard. My folks that really know me and my personality know that it's an ironic drawback I've got. Oh well, we all have them. I have to say I was glad that it happened...I was outside the University, smoking a stog and analyzing the situation to myself. I needed to talk to someone and it was around lunch time. I head back to the casa and my host dad was waiting on me to have lunch. I had one of the most fruitful talks I've had with him. I totally unloaded all my frustrations with him. He was super reassuring giving me little bits of advice here and there. I was grateful for it. The ironic part of it all was that I unloaded all of it with the most flawless Spanish I've used since I've been here...I even used some of the stuff I read over the past few days that I couldn't get down in a semester as well as some stuff I didn't think I knew. Being around everything has made an impact on me and I was worried that it wasn't. It was reassuring to know that I'm making progress towards my goal. I've made a decision for the rest of the trip to try to build with folks that share my interest...not alienating the others, but I've got to think about what I want out of this thing and if I've got to be drastic to do it..then so be it I will.

Next...Happy 4th yall! Honestly, today makes me really miss home. I've always been a big fan of the fellowship that today brings. I miss my family, homies, beer and grilling out on food and meaningful conversation. I'm grateful to be here and being here makes me more grateful for what I'm blessed with back in good ol' Amurrica. I'm fortunate to have a good group of people here as well at least we have each other to help the grip of us to remain mindful of what I've just said. I hope all of your holidays are blessed. Felíz Día de Indepencia de España!

Real World: Santander...Located in the sunny REAL WORLD.

I'm going to try and keep this portion of one short, but that might be unlikely. I've got to rant for a bit. I think the tension is going to rise high over the next few days. The formula of this thought is composed of one part realism, one part paranoia, and the remaining half comes from the fact that everyone is different. Personalities clash or coalesce, but sometimes albeit rarely (in my opinion) reach a feasible consensus in situations such as ours. We're all in a different country and we're dealing with it in our own ways. All of us have expectations from this place and this journey at large. I personally want to grow from all of this. Fun is fun and it can manifest itself in various ways. I like a little of everything. You can learn from any situation whether it be in the classroom or in the everyday. I'm not a tourist here, that's not what I want to be. I want to be part of the life here, if not for a small fraction of time. I want to learn about myself, this culture and those around me. I want to leave here knowing that I've built a foundation that's beneficial for both myself and those I've come into (and will) come into contact with in the future. I feel that lines have been established among us and I don't feel comfortable with that. Judgements..ill ones tend to be made when things like this arise. Personally, I don't have an outstanding problem with anyone I'm with here. Reservations? I've got them...Hell, We all do and that's the fact of the matter, but nothing so grave as to make me overtly hate. It's not worth it. I hope we can talk and keep things objective/constructive. I'm trying to keep things objective for my own good, but there comes a time where you got to let someone know what time it is. For my own benefit, to get things off my chest..I'm listing words and things that are beginning to grate on me: I'm not naming names but if you get mad by reading this, then you need to reevaluate your knowledge of self....besides I'd tell this stuff to the parties involved if they ever opened up the opportunity...believe that.
Clique(ishness)
Pretentious attitudes
Inability to held accountable.
English.
Lack of Spanish.
Inability to be forthcoming.
Backhandedness
Shallow thinking.
I'm lifting all of this bullshit up to whatever omnipotence exists in the vast expanse of well....existence. It won't go away, but at least I'll be able to rise over it. This week is new and I'm going to use it to reevaluate and examine myself in order to increase my understanding. Rant accomplished.
So that's the 'haps as for now. I've been spending a good bit of time by myself. I realize more and more everyday how much I have to step my Spanish game up. I think that the more I listen and observe that things are making more sense. I wish conversation was easier for me though...not that it isn't in general, but using a different language can really test someone's patience if you're not so adept of language. That's one thing that's been a downer for me. So many times I want to just get out there and converse with the world. I understand most accents and what not almost fluently. I get what's being said, but I'm not a quickdraw with speaking back. I believe that will come with time. I feel that it's a combination of everything that will help me get better with speech. Understanding the basis of a culture is one of the most key elements to learning its language. Nuria has stated this before in previous classes. I never doubted her statement of fact for a moment, but I will admit I took it for granted. I just have to open up more and more to be able to open up more in the future. I've still got time. I've started hitting the books..building my verb bank and relearning the grammar I've always had a hard time with. Alongside being in the culture where all this comes from, I understand how the language is implemented more and more. It makes more sense every thought I refer back to, slowly but surely. I've got to keep this mindset maintained. Lately, I've been feeling somewhat accomplished. I spend alot of time walking the city just listening to what's in my ears...the people, beats I haven't had the chance to listen to and what not. My music lately makes me feel like I have a personal soundtrack all the time. The mixtape is definitely coming along nicely as far as my track selection. I found the record spots here, found some dope stuff, but now to do the homework as to whether the prices are worth it or if I can find them elsewhere before I commit the euros to them. The conversions are not forgiving that's for sure, but yah...it's just money. The experience here is priceless. Slowly, I've become accustomed to where I'm at, but I want to become more a part of it and understand. It's not all good all the time, but I can say I'm better than I was before.

So...I don't feel like detailing everything...

I know these posts have been mad late. So I'm going to keep this brief as possible and try to fit in as much as I can...Y'all have to read this after all.

So yeah, I'm in Santander officially. Yesterday marked the pass of my first week in Spain...which means that time is about to fly by hella quick. I'll try to sum this up as best I can. So yah...Arrival. The train ride here was really dope. The scenery was absolutely amazing. The country is so verdant and dynamic. It was dope to see remnants of old architecture sprouting from between the new architecture and what not. It just goes to show that this country remembers its past. It's a redundancy that I'm going to keep mentioning probably. (...haha) I was fortunate to be awake for the majority of the ride, the reward was I got to see most of it. I know I was exhausted, it was the apprehension that did it most likely. It was nice to see Nuria (our professor and group leader) when we got here. It was nice to see a familiar face. I met with my host father Mino shortly after that. I consider myself lucky to be hosted by him. He's a super nice guy, hella smart and really knowledgable about history...Santander, Spain and the world in general. I talk to him about everything that I don't get to talk to my own pops about..refreshing for sure. I like the city so far, it reminds me of Washington state in the summer. It's verdant, hilly, cool enough not to be oppressive, but not so hot that it makes you want to kill yourself...Duval take a peep at Santander's weather and civil planning game...you could learn something.

Today was the second day of classes. In the meantime, we've been living it up as the locals do here. Life here is so relaxed. People work mad hard to relax harder. I can deal with that. Things start late here from an American persepective. I love how they take siestas into consideration here. All of us have had an ill time thus far. We've been going out almost everyday taking in what this city has to offer in our individual ways. The campus is small, but comfortable. The staff here is super helpful and there's everything that we need within an arms reach (in my opinion.) I love being able to walk to everything safely. The food is bomb, the people mind their own business and what not. Things are good..if not great. Unfortunately more details later...this library is about to close and I'm personally tired of being cramped in here...the city and..homework await...

Missed you internet!

So time to catch up again…about time? I know right? Synopsis time!

22.06.11 (day.month.year let’s get European.)

The day of the actual Santander trip was a well…a trip. We made an early rise at the crack of dawn…for no apparent reason. Oh well, paranoid planning makes for an interesting bedfellow…personality…whatever. Today is the day that the rest of the group gets into Madrid. The morning was pretty amazing…the air was fresh for being as metropolitan as it is. It was just before the city itself was beginning to take its first breath. The city was rousing itself just like we were for ourselves. In lieu of that, we decided to take one last stroll around the city while we were able to enjoy it. It was best that we take in some of the spots we caught the previous night and check them out during their daytime form. We ended up peeping souvenirs and other various window-shopping goodness. I’m going to miss this city for the next few weeks.

Allow me to rant on about this place a bit more. I love the way that this city breathes. The city feels so old, but at the same time so modern. It’s an interesting metaphor like the new built upon the old, as if the city itself based its progress on where it came from. Other signs of this lie in the street culture as well. “Los Indignadas” are what they’re called. They’re like a 20/21^st century version of the Taiyozoku of Japan. Some back history, the term stems from a group of high school to college aged youth in postwar Japan, a group of hopeless youth rendered indifferent for the fiscal and social future of the nation and its government. The difference in the Indignadas is that they’re done with being indifferent and complacent and they’re willing to fight and speak out against the injustice of their government. From what I gather, its overly conservative here, but the point isn’t put down like it is in the US. There are no party wars, just a struggle against the unjust powers in control. This country has a chance to really explode with growth; a spark of inspiration needs to happen to put it simply. It’s a matter of nothing more and nothing less in my opinion, but obviously it’s going to be more difficult than that. Nonetheless, it inspires me the change that the youth in this country want for its nation and culture. So yah…enough soapbox.

This Madrid experience is way too short lived, but oh well. I’ll be back the end of the road surely enough. We decided to taxi it up to head to Madrid Chamartin (the train station to Santander…and a grip of other places in this country). I have to say that the drivers here are straight G. They drive manual through these narrow, busy ass streets, creeping in between the tightest of spaces. Cars, alleys and what not, these drivers can’t be faded. It was nice seeing the city by car. It’s a totally different perspective though brief. The vista is so dynamic. Saw mad graff and got to check out the highway system in Europe from a glimpse. We got to see more of the city in a short time, much more efficiently than on foot mind you. I can’t believe that we made it in the time we did throughout that horrible traffic. The driver took care of us fat for sure. We finally made it to Chamartin. Finally, the group is together. I felt bad for them, because they basically looked how we felt on our first day in Madrid. That cramped, dirty, no-sleep travel feeling is a downer for sure. I totally understood. Everyone is looking forward to getting to point B, ready to sleep and shower and all those lovely amenities….ooohhh yeah.

The truth to Day 1: The Madrid Experience.

So I've never been more ready to get off a plane than in that moment. I was completely sleep-deprived, dirty, and a variety of expletives. The primary thing on my mind was how to get ourselves and belongings to the hostel and shower and recoup. Maneuvering through Barajas airport was mad strange so many twists and turns and stairs, lifts and escalators. It felt like some labyrinthine premonition...and it totally was, but more on that later. After weaving through the maze from The Shining, we made it to baggage claim. It took forever for us to cop our belongings as was expected. After than, we were pretty much lost in finding a way to the Metro station. We had the directions, but didn't know how to get to step one. We managed to ask for directions after a few cigarettes and unnecessary waiting. Everything in that damned aeropuerto is so spread out, but thankfully the line to the airport is basically the aorta to the city. The subways reminded me of New York which was nice and familiar in a bittersweet way. The last thing I wanted was to be cramped in a tight confine again, but oh well it's that or not get to the hostel. I was super en guard on the metro and combined with my lack of sleep and ever growing fatigue I was not a happy camper. We managed to maneuver though, my travel buddy was not thrilled about the ride. I would do the Metro again, but not her. She wants to taxi it up for the main part of the trip. Ehh...I'm not about that. Anyhow, finally we get off of 3 lines and countless exchanges and now we're officially out the Metro and on the streets of Madrid. The weather here is similar to home, but the kicker is that it doesn't have the raggedy-ass, smoky humidity that Duval has had for the past week or so. I didn't mind so much the radiant heat from all areas rather the suck factor was in having to lug mad kilos worth of belongings up flights of stairs and such throughout the Metro station and finally the hostel.

I've learned something about hostels pretty much. One, they aren't slasher movie experiences like in movies with titles of similar name. Two, I hate keys. We get to the hostel and we're having a hell of a time using Spanish to the jefe of the establishment. We had to wait forever to get our rooms and had to again lug our lives around with us yet again (and again when we check out fml) Why do these places have keys for every single solitary thing. I suppose in hindsight it was cool for safety purposes, but it's so unnecessarily convoluted. Those damned things were the root of all evil. We were even locked on our floor because a nameless someone (not I, real) turned the key the wrong way and got us locked on our floor. That was an unnecessary hassle, but eventually rectified. Anyhow, on a more lofty tip. I have to say that this city is freaking amazing. It has the energy and diversity of NY (not to mention varieties of gastronomic delights), but with historical and cultural flavor that supplements its distinct identity. This city is beautiful, so much about it screams history past and present. We took two trips during the day, the first was short lived mostly because I felt like shit, dirty and jetlagged. Rectified most easily, with a 4 hour nap haha. Finally, it was around 8:30 our time (post the keys fiasco) and we were finally able to rollout and enjoy walking the city. We traced the steps of the places we started, but didn't finish at the time. We've got mad pics, I can't wait to show those. The people flood the streets here, we saw street shows, mad government protesting and even visited the ol' Starbucks. The latter was fun, I got to compare experiences with the partners there over Spanish. It's hard for me to describe the whole undertaking here, this place definitely has to be seen to understand the experience. I don't mean to be overbearing but there's a myriad of things to see and do it seems here. I like the energy of this place, it's definitely something I encourage all my friends to experience. Its' going to be dope once all my class family makes it here..which is tminus 4 hours. I'm enjoying all of it, I've used more vocal Spanish than I've used in all of my classes, I can hear and feel the improvement of it all. The highlight of my day at large was walking and taking in all the sights and having Spanish convos with Rebecca aka Travel buddy. We capped the night at a small cafe close to the Puerta del Sol, using the language to shoot the shit about life and the experience. It was so enriching, I feel free out here, no worries than to improve myself, broaden my horizons and not worry about working for the man. I look forward to what the next 7 weeks will bring. Stay up on it! I know I will...on to the next one!